Judgement free zone – Mommy shame

So here’s some tea,

We’ve all dealt with some sort of mommy shade or shame, from the day we found out we were pregnant to the rearing of our little ones. It’s enviable, it will happen if you like it or not. Trust me I wish it wouldn’t happen. It would be nice if as parents, grandparents and damn well as human beings we can refrain from sticking our judgey nose in other people’s life choices.

I’ve experienced shade throughout my pregnancy even till now. Oh man, the day everyone found out we were having a girl. Is it me or do you notice a difference of people’s excitement for you depending on the gender?

As a female myself I can say without a doubt girls rock! Eh okay maybe not every aspect of it but in general we are pretty bad ass. And Yes we probably will try for a boy eventually but if we have another girl yay! Glitter parties all around.

Having a daughter is a blessing, so don’t you ever disregard my little warrior princess she will do amazing things. And for those who have a misogynistic and sexist view of having a male heir to pass the family name on; chill out. We aren’t royalty my daughter will do the name proud (clearly I’m passionate about it)

A few subjects I’ve recently talked about were postpartum bodies, breastfeeding and cosleeping. You don’t understand the amount of judgement that is tagged along with pretty much all of them.

“you’re going to have a mom bod”

Well no guff but there’s nothing negative about that. I don’t look like a swimsuit model and I don’t plan to. I’m comfortable with how I look and my man doesn’t mind the sight either, so I’m golden Pony-boy. If you don’t want to look at my saggy boobs and stretchy tummy in a bikini don’t look because I’m about to bay watch in this place (cue slow motion)

“You’re still breastfeeding ?”

“How long do you plan to breastfeed?”

“You want to self wean? Why? “

“Formula fed? really you couldn’t breastfed?”

“It’s more healthier to breastfed”

Okay first off I was a formula baby and my daughter is a breast milk baby. We are both more than fine and healthy. Which ever you choose you know best for your child. Breastfeeding is not only physical but emotional. Many things can hinder lactation. Therefore, when some moms can’t produce there is a lot more going on than you think so hush and please don’t judge. This isn’t a competition of which is the best, do what’s best for you and your baby! Forget the rest.

Cosleeping and raising your little one is where I’m at today. My daughter sleeps in her crib attached to our bed. If you don’t like that then that’s fine, you aren’t sleeping there so it’s not your concern. Raising your little one and disclipne is new to me. This is my first baby so I’m figuring it out as I go but she’s young and doesn’t quite understand “no” yet without giggling.

I still get those judgey looks in the supermarket when she’s gets fussy or the turned up faces when she gets her way. It’s funny because it’s always the ones without children or elderly people that have an issue. It makes me laugh though when you pass another mom and their child is being just as loud. You end up making eye contact with each other and a smirk as some sort of solidarity of the struggles of parenthood.

Moms stop judging each other, we are all trying to figure it out.

Everyone else piss off please 🙂

#judgementfreezone

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